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November 29 前路。paint it to black
as the night's never met the dawn
as you've never suffered enough
as your mind's never fooled you
November 26 沉醉不知归路。Waiting for the rain
while this is a land with tremendous rain
I am still waiting for the rain
Years ago
I was waiting for the sunshine
waiting for the greens
waiting for the flowers
to bloom
But now
I am waiting for the rain
the times
May 26 好似夏眠又开始了。醒，很是漫长。
好似夏眠又开始了。 冒个泡儿再睡。 NASA， NG，FT，FB，ENR，BBC，REUTERS。 Rome，Tony Harrison，禅外，词话。
来不及宵夜就迷糊了。
March 14 事儿堆。事儿一堆。有的没的，自找的。
终于倒了。
 倒叙。
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3。
ED在电话里怯生生地问：“你还好吧？”
一早已精疲力竭的我回：“恩。说吧。什么事？”
ED：＂___ __ __----++++########!!&&&&##@@@@!!＂
我：＂No. !!!!!!!!!!!!!NNN&&&&&&&!!!!!!!!!!!!!!&&&&&&&&!!!!!!!!!!!!!!＂
ED：＂_______ ＿＿＿－－－－＿＿＿＿@@@@@@@@@@@@################＂
我：＂ !!!!!!!!!!!!!No!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!NNNNNNNNN&&&&&&!!!!!!!!!!!!!!＂
累极了。第一次毫不妥协地拒绝被忽悠。拒绝变成利益斗争的牺牲品。
这不靠谱的年代。
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２。
A命B彻查某项目。
B似吃错了药，一改之前谦卑的样儿指着一个似是而非的问题对我傲慢无礼。我忍着。
边解释可能的原因，边翻看工作记录，竟然找不到任何相关信息。一时怀疑起自己的记性。
再核对文件版本后缀时才知根本与我无关。所谓出错的部分是A负责创建的。
我“请”A察看系统记录和相关文件，“请”他说明错误原因。
A极小声地忽悠了一句，显然不承认是错误。
等B大摇大摆地喝完茶回来。
我把问题再解释了一遍，附上一句：详情请问A，这部分不是我做的。
B顿时变脸：＂OK.OK.OKOKOK....＂
这不靠谱的年代。
 (日光下竟是粉紫的。夜里的灯光一揉就成了“花痴”里的鲜红。）
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1。
下午５点半。
老板坐到我桌边：“怎么还没回去？１０个多小时了，留着点事儿周一再忙。”
。。。
这不靠谱的年代。
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0。
Ｇ电问，５０朵是不是给我添麻烦了。
我哭。要不再麻烦Arena的人帮我直接把花栽后院吧。
谢谢。
这不靠谱的年代。别当真。
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－１。
AA打趣说，事儿堆得高才好，要不我掉书堆里枯死。
凑近又问，昨儿你桌下那一大盒子是花吧？他好sweet哦。
。。。
December 26 Say Goodbye。悠长假期
November 01 席地而坐。闲适慢慢滋生。
如蚕丝裹着历历目目。
却暖暖平意。
CD依旧，茶依旧。
笔依旧。 而字。懒在怀里。
每个清晨。
都很美。
October 12 不加班也不旅行的周末。日子忽忽而过。人却慢悠起来。
懒的出门，连听Mozart专场的票也转送了。 吃完最后一颗爆米花，半躺在沙发上翻Oscar Wilde。 CD里响起了Bach的某只钢琴协奏。 迷糊着有马兰头、白枣、荠菜馄饨、苋菜面疙瘩吃的儿时光景...... 睡睡醒醒。还剩半瓶WKD时，嫩白的月已爬上深秋的树梢。 正好，乘会儿凉，回些个email和missed call。
September 01 Walking @ Dunoon。周末小记。
于苏格兰海边小镇Dunoon。
August 25 A Perfect Day
A perfect day.
Sure, there would not be any perfect day exactly in vivid life. But if you insist, it is just the day worthy to be recorded. With a cup of wine close to be finished, I am now trying to record this perfect day. After devoting myself to hard work during these months, there are so much more hungers to be professional in my career and wise with humors in daily life. Yet I left off all the temptations and slept till around 12 when the sky is so nicely bright blue. Summer is gone without doubt but this country seems to be possessed by the autumn of Athena, full of tremendous favor of tranquil harmonies. This is what I’ve realized I really expect for, although I’ve never been dreamed of leaving Shanghai, my lovely hometown for long.
It was half past seven in the fresh morning when I woke up as usual, with very amazing dream bearing in mind. I decided to spoil myself with a longer sleep since the short holiday was just to begin. What a pity that I couldn’t remember a corner of that wonderful dream, even though I mentioned the last bit that I could recall to lovely little Ss this noon online.
When opening my eyes again, it was my African Darcy sweetly shining by the window with the silver clock singing in its way. I jumped up, switched on one of my favorite works of Chris Spheeris' – Carino, popped into the kitchen, grabbed a cup of milk which I merely do as I prefer to have soya as a morning refreshing. But unfortunately, I had just an egg and little milk in store of my huge funny frige in this single apartment. Laundry and shopping was the only thing I should finish today as I had thought. Yet, cheers from Ss, I gotta know the Beijing’s Olympic was going to end today.
I was such far away from the favor of Olympics, which is still unbelievable now to me. Working seemed to be the marvelous music I’d been ever enjoying, but I did feel a little shame and regretful since I missed the time to be in any part of this great event, even a pure audience. Probably, a few overseas souls would agree that one would never be so proud of his motherland to show the world of its grand until he is standing in the other side of the world, far from his homeland. I bet little lovely Ss would never know the sadness it could be in my mind if I couldn’t see the wonderful ending moment while I had plenty of time to find the possibility.
Little Ss is such a lovely friend of mine, smart and tender. I wish I could have understood as much as she does in the splendid sea of literacy and Chinese philosophy. Yet I am so far away to surf. The question she landed to me today is what I wish to be if I had been given a birth again. The answer is entirely simple – a stone, which I’ve murmured in front of many friends of mine before. “But why?” she kept asking. I was too keen on searching the possible links for the Olympics’ ending to discuss on such a grey topic to me. It reminds me so many years of tears I’d been through. Fortunately, I was saved. It was around 12:52 that I merely lost my confidence in touching such a wonderful moment of the Olympics. Ss kindly notified me of the shopping I should do today because I had no food in store. The supermarket will definitely be closed because of the Bank Holiday when no one would like to spoil their human right in this tranquil island. Just about to leave with tiny sorrow, Zy appeared with regards, who I haven’t talked with for several months and I am absolutely delightful everytime I saw him. It's fun that both of us reach the point that we have already known that the generation gap does exist between us. Also, what I haven't told him is the feeling that sometime I would rather keep silence when I feel gaps between anyone and me.
Trees are trees with leaves reborn year after year, but you would never be able to change their cells thoroughly in the possible frame of yours. Sometimes, you know it gonna happen and it does happen without any chance to change in advance. so called destiny? Or natural circle? Yet one does need help from experienced or encyclopedic ones with good sense, although life of oneself might be amazingly remote from their expectations under very likely higer view of life.
Zy mentioned that unconventional status after going through miserable life should never be settled in rotten shelter, which I definitely agree and is exactly the steps I am now riding my life towards. After a short conversation with Zy, I met Ss again and I explained why I choose to be a stone and my view of pure nature partly in sense of kidding. Absolutely, I know that Ss is such a genius in philosophy, the spiriturality that I have a long way to reach.
Surely perfect. Vsible passion from the Beijing's Olympics was filled in my room finally. If you know I rarely sleep which is doomed to kill myself sooner or later, you would understand that I would rather explorating the running event than go shopping for survive. Yet Ss seemed not, partly because she cares me more than myself. While there came the day I had decided to spoil myself again with funs I was longing for, music, books and such a great event in China.
It was a great performance of Chinese culture and the spiritural again, as rich behind as its openning curtain on 16 days ago, which should remain in the eye of the whole world. Yet we need more comunication as the ouside world seems have less favor in what chinese philosophy exactly brings out. However, I would say there are much more to do besides mutual understanding and support. That is the envrionmental sustainability of development in the whole system of matters and spirits on earth or in universe.
After the short splendid ending of the Olympics, I rushed out to the supermarket. I was so lucky that I just picked up all the stuff listed in my mind before the check-out was closed. Belgian chocolate & vanilla mousse, Nandos hot source, Italian pasta, Scotish biscuit, fresh cod and spinach, little plunt and red wine. All in deduction. Diving into a book of Ocsar Wilde's is such a perfect ending of this summer, which led me here, messying around the words to record a day.
When writing, a warm call from my dear mum, a touched email from Gg, and greetings from Xc and Ss...... Now I am in the light down of the following day. thinking of Ss's words - “空而不着，则物我两忘”...
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